Tuesday's Choices

Sick, but I love it. Here's Tuesday's Choices . . .

Would you rather:

1. Run a mile with a cracked shinbone OR do 50 situps with a cracked tailbone?
Well, since I cracked my tailbone EXACTLY 14 years, 265 days, 5 hrs and 16 mins ago (but who's counting . . .)  while bareback riding, I think I'll run a mile thank you! ! !

2. Be stuck beside somebody with horrible body odor on a crowded subway car for 10 stops OR against someone with an obvious erection on a long elevator ride?
I've been stuck with the BO so bad you'd confuse them for a skunk, but it's passable. The boner would probably cause me to get one too. Now that would be embarrassing. BO please!!!

3. Feed your children by regurgitation OR have to lick them to bathe them?
As dirty as my two get? Please!! Open wide kiddies, daddy's home!!!

4. While still living, get a glimpse of heaven OR hell?
Since I don't believe in hell and just being in the presence of my wife and children is heaven, let say hell. Then I'd know if I was wrong and change my wicked, evil ways PDQ! ! !